Tuesday, October 9, 2007
Raising teenager is challenging and uncomfortable.
I have teenagers and butterflies, maybe that will explain why I have not blogged in a long time. Both do not leave very positive things to blog about. And I certainly do not want to "bemoan" on this blog.
So here I will share about how teenagers and butterflies go hand in hand.
Above, I shared about the butterflies in my stomach. I worry about my girls choices, they aren't always healthy, sometimes down right destructive. I worry about the next moment when I have to confront my daughter on something she is doing that is not acceptable, I worry about what consequences she will face. I worry, I worry, I fear and I Pray. (I am getting better at the praying first part.)
But just as a caterpillar is not a caterpillar forever, my daughter will not be a teenager forever. Angel has proven that God has had her in Hand at all times and she is now a beautiful butterfly. A new creation, who makes good choices, and is succeeding.
I hate the butterflies in my belly and I plan to combat them with a trust in God. He promises "I know the plans I have for your life, they are of good and not evil." -Jeremiah
I choose to trust Him. That is called faith. Every person has faith in something whether it be a paycheck, themselves, or something else. I have learned the faith I want to have is not in myself but rather in my God. I look at my butterfly daughter, Angel, and know I put my faith where it belongs.
I love the butterflies that flutter around, there are even some still out this late in October. My youngest, Princess, points them all out to me.
I remember, butterflies start as caterpillars, plain and slow, eating their way through life. Then they add something special to this world. BEAUTY
My caterpillar won't be a caterpillar forever. The butterflies in my belly will dissipate with my trust in God and they will soar through my daughter as she grow up from caterpillar to butterfly.
Last night My husband, Sonshine(7), Princess(4), and I were sitting on the back porch, My 4 year old daughter commented that my breath was REALLY bad. Then she followed up with " but you are still really beautiful mom." Thank God bad breath and beauty don't go hand in hand.
God has really taken to making sure I know I am beautiful to Him. He does it through my two young children.
One day I refused to put makeup on. I had no where to go until that evening and it seemed like too much work on my relaxing day. "I will put it on later." I decided
"Later came to quick. In my hustle to take Angel to work, feed my family, and get to my appointed meeting on time, I neglected to "put my face on" as my grandma would say.
We pulled into the parking spot when I finally remembered my neglected face. "Oh great," I mumbled, "How could I have forgotten my makeup" My 7 year old Sonshine piped up with "Mom, you are so pretty you don't need any make up." I smiled at him, brushing his comment off as something all little boys say about their mommies.
He hopped out of the car and walked up to a beautiful bush that was turning red and yellow with the onset of fall. "Mom," he said in a grown up voice, "do you see this beautiful plant? It does not have any makeup on and it is beautiful...because God made it. You are beautiful because God made you." I stopped, gazing first at him then at the plant. "Sonshine," I said, "thank you for reminding me how beautiful I am."
I see the beauty in others. My friends and family are the most beautiful people I have ever met. But finding the beauty in me... well that is another story. But my children, my God, will not allow me to see myself as anything less. The world may see a plain girl or they may not notice me at all, but my God notices me and He is faithful to remind me through the eyes and mouth of my babes.
Saturday, September 1, 2007
Wednesday, August 29, 2007
I have been up around 6am every morning ( okay almost every morning) to do a bible study. One I have joined with some of the most precious ladies. It is a bible study that requires daily attention, one that helps me with my real and personal relationship with God. I have tried diligently to keep up on the daily lessons so as not to fall behind my dear friends.
I am now more than a week behind.
This last week God has had different plans for our intimate meetings.
My relationship with my 15 year old daughter has been on edge. We have both been angry, frustrated and disappointed with each other. " She is a teenager, it is supposed to be a rocky time." I would tell myself. "She is going through a normal stage." "It won't be forever." All these beliefs did not improve our relationship. My stomach was still sick with worry for her, for me, for our family.
God, knowing me so well and caring for me and my family, met me daily for our intimate conversations. For a while, He allowed me to do all the talking. I poured out my hurt, disappointments, frustrations and anxieties to my Lord. He listened. Then after some wise counsel from a dear friend, I changed my attitude and praised the Lord who listened to me daily.
I am a week behind in my bible study because I have spent every minuted of my bible study time praying for my daughter.
Last night my daughter and I had a conversation. She said, "No one likes me for who I am, No one really knows me." (she expressed that she meant her family) I denied this passionatly, brushing it off as another episode of drama. "If she thinks this, she really dosen't know ME...I KNOW my children," I told myself. "I know what they like to eat and do." I PRIDE myself on knowing my children.
So again this morning, I took my frustration to God, explaining to Him that He needed to fix my daughter's thinking.
If you know my God you already know what happened.
He did not fix my daughters thinking (that I know of), He fixed mine.
How many times have you watched your daughter skateboard ?( something she is very passionate about)"
He asked me.
"When is the last time you encouraged her in this sport she is in love with?" "Have you even tried to get to know the people she thinks do know her? The ones she believes likes her for who she is?"
I tried to explain to God that skateboarding isn't really a sport, not to mention it is dangerous and she refused to wear the protective gear. I explained that the kids who skate do drugs and smoke. ( freely admitted by my 15 year old. )
I could feel Him smile at me. "
I will take care of the protective part, you take care of getting to know the daughter I gave you."He said.
This Saturday, I am going to the skate park with my daughter. I have offered to buy pizza for her skater friends. I am going to meet her friends who I have held at an arms distance. I am going to get to know who my daughter is so that she can see that I really do like who she is.
P.S She swears to me that she has absolutely no desire to smoke or do drugs,
but I know praying she keeps this attitude won't hurt.
My God is Good, God is my LIFE, My Life is good.
Thursday, August 2, 2007
My son turned 7 about a week ago, yet it seems that he was just born.... not that long ago. Where did the time go? This year for his birthday we were in Steamboat for a family vacation. He wanted to go fishing with his grandpa, his sister Angel, and his daddy. They planned it for 6:30am, I guess the early bird gets the fish. Grandpa came down the stair of the condo at 6:15am to quietly wake SonSine up. Much to his surprise, Son Shine was already awake and greeted Grandpa with an enthusiastic " Hi Grandpa, time to go fishing?" Off they went, right on time. Their plan was to use fish eggs, however, their plan changed when they found a full container of worms left by someone even earlier than them. Every time they cast their line they caught a fish. Daddy told me later that they were lucky that they finally ran out of worms or fishing may have lasted all day long. What a great blessing, what a great memory for my son's 7th birthday.
Monday, July 30, 2007
Saturday, July 21, 2007
Tuesday, July 17, 2007
This weekend, while I was trying to stay cool in the hot weather, my brother and sister in law, my husband and my 15 year old daughter, Beans, trekked off to climb Mt. Massive. Mt. Massive is 14 thousand feet above sea level. It is also the 2nd highest mountain in Colorado. WOW. They started their climb at 6:30am and reached the top 4 hours later. Hubby said that about 1 hour into their climb Beans looked as though she was exhausted and determined never to climb a 14er again. However, she pushed through, never once uttering a complaint. Way to go!!!! When she got home she talked about what a great time she had and how she was looking forward to climbing again. This is the 4th 14 footer my husband has climbed and hopefully the first of many Beans will climb. Meanwhile, back at the ranch, we hit the fountains in Old Town Arvada. I was blessed to be able to watch my 2 year old nephew. The kids got along great. When Husband got home he showed me the pictures and I felt winded just looking at them they were breathtaking. I may even be persuaded to hike a mountain, but not one called MT. MASSIVE.
Friday, July 13, 2007
Thursday, July 12, 2007
But even better, I love having fun when the price tag is FREE.
So as summer approached, I rose to the challenge of finding fun, FREE things to do with my family. It was a sort of adventure.
Here is the list of adventures we have had this year:
Monday, Daddy is off and that is the most fun of all.
We have attended a bible study/play date every Tuesday.
Every Wednesday we mosey on over to the local theater and take in a free previously seen movie at 10am. We just saw Eragon, it was even better on a big screen, however seeing Charlotte the spider and Templeton the Rat bigger than life was a little unnerving.
Thursday we take advantage of the fun free things the library has offered with their summer reading program. Bowling, eating at chick fil a, a lakeside trip (soon to be had). Next Thursday we are going to go for Ice Cream For FREE!!!!!!!! What is cooler that that, no pun in tented.
Oh........... and of coarse we have been reading.
Laced in and out of these various adventure, we have attended free, ticked events offered by the libraries. Today we attended two, the second being a magic comedy. Watching the kids laugh and the amazement on their faces at the magic was worth more that all the money in the world.
On the way to each event we listen to books on CD in the car. We have three going right now. "Adventures in Odyssey" when all the the kiddos are there, "Harmless" when only Corine and Rachel ( since it covers topics for more Mature audiences,) and when I get the few opportunities to be alone on a road trip I listen to "Gilead." My kids love it and get upset when I turn the car off. It is magical watching them use their imaginations as they picture what is going on in the story.( I have rented all these books on CD from the library and they will remain free if I remember to return them on time. apparently the due date is not just a suggestion: )
And Friday is just not Friday unless we go over to Uncle Steve's and the cousin's to play football in and out of their pool.
Part of this summer is the fountains they put in front of the Arvada Library. Fully clothed or in a swim suit, the kids love to get wet in the water that shoots out of the ground.
While My husband and I were in Alaska, Nana and Papa opened their pool and that will be our next spot for free enjoyment.
I figure the kids will have to go back to school to get some rest. Our summer has been grand.
Tuesday, July 10, 2007
My Husband and I took in Alaska and all it's wonders by float plane, raft trip, cruise and open road. What a glorious, and chilly, place. In Alaska you get the diversity of Colorado plus Ocean, Glaciers and big Mosquitoes. We saw Whales, a moose, and a bear from the sky in the float plane as well as a lot of land only accessible by plane. I loved to fly in a float plane, much to my suprise and hope to see the world this way someday.
On land we saw Bears ( lots of them) catching Salmon swimming upstream. We saw moose and more bald Eagles then I have ever seen in my life. We took a trip down the icy river that started from a glacier. and do I mean Icy. We even experienced the feeling of being on some great rapids without a guide, as ours, hitting a rapid too sideways was swept out the the raft into the icy water. That was quite a heart racing time. Even though I knew the rapids we rafted on were class 4s and 5s and offered danger and excitement even with a guide, it sure was comforting when he was back in control of things. ( I think there is a parable in there somewhere:)) And we partyed until 11:30pm even till 1:am on some nights because the sun didn't go down until then. We did miss seeing the fireworks though.
Thank God for cell phones so we could stay in touch with our kiddos who we missed much. We didn't let our missing the kids spoil our "honeymoon." Our 4th "honeymoon" to be excact, thanks to our generous parents who offer us this valuable opportuntiy. It was good for the kids to get a "vacation" from us too and they love staying at Nana's and Papa's.