Wednesday, July 22, 2009

Angel turns 18

Today Angel turns 18, the age of so called adulthood.

One day out of the blue, after a year of doing so great,She left, no warning just came home irate and left. this happened in April.

Stated she couldn't stand living here anymore, would rather live under a bridge with other homeless people. She lasted there two weeks begging then made her way to her bio mom's work then taken in by her bio mom.

People ask, "have you heard from Angel?"
so many other awful and wonderful things have happened since then that we forget about Angel and her hatefulness until that time when she calls every night to check in.

See, we had to threatened to file a runaway report if she didn't let us know where she was every night or social services threatened to charge us with neglect.

So, yes, she calls every night to let us know how wonderful she is doing, how she loves her tatoo, and how her 24 year old boyfriend wants to take her to Mexico on her 18 birthday and how he pays for everything for her, or how she is snuggling with the bio mom who abandoned her when she was 9 to the foster care system.

The calls are excruciating to listen to.

She is now 18 and tonight we won't get a call, there is no need, she is an "adult" now, we are not longer responsible.

This is bitter sweet, an end to one pain the start of another.
Good bye dear Angel. Good bye, it has been hard and painful and I know sometimes wonderful.
Good bye and good luck to you in your future.

THis song makes me think of this, a soulful sound to our pain.
I am listening to it a lot today.

Fire And Rain
------James Taylor

Just yesterday morning they let me know you were gone
Suzanne the plans they made put an end to you
I walked out this morning and I wrote down this song
I just can't remember who to send it to

I've seen fire and I've seen rain
I've seen sunny days that I thought would never end
I've seen lonely times when I could not find a friend
But I always thought that I'd see you again

Won't you look down upon me, Jesus
You've got to help me make a stand
You've just got to see me through another day
My body's aching and my time is at hand
And I won't make it any other way

oh, I've seen fire and I've seen rain
I've seen sunny days that I thought would never end
I've seen lonely times when I could not find a friend
But I always thought that I'd see you again

I’ve been walking my mind to an easy time
My back turned towards the sun
Lord knows when the cold wind blows it’ll turn your head around
Well, there’s hours of time on the telephone line
To talk about things to come
Sweet dreams and flying machines in pieces on the ground.

oh, I've seen fire and I've seen rain
I've seen sunny days that I thought would never end
I've seen lonely times when I could not find a friend
But I always thought that I'd see you, baby, one more time again, now

Thought I'd see you one more time again
There's just a few things coming my way this time around, now
Thought I'd see you, thought I'd see you fire and rain, now

2 comments:

Robin said...

I'm sorry friend, I know this is painful for you. You - and Angel - are in our prayers.

lynchpin said...

Thank you my friend.