Psalm 13

How long, O Lord? will you forget me forever? How long will you hide your face from me? How long must I wrestle with my thoughts and everyday have sorrow in my heart? How long will my enemy triumph over me? Look on me and answer, O lord my God. Restore the sparkle to my eyes. My enemy will say "I have overcome him and my foes will rejoice when I fall.

But I trust in your unfailing love; My heart rejoices in your salvation. I will sing to the Lord for he has been good to me. Psalm 13

I can't believe how often my mind think "it just isn't fair that Jim died."
As if Life and death has some sense of justice. As if God doesn't know what He is doing. AS if He is not in control. Things come up during the day and I think about Jim and again I think, it just isn't fair, he shouldn't have died.

Then we lose my oldest daughter, she is pregnant with my grand-daughter (she found out yesterday) living with a guy she moved in with 1 week after meeting him. She is happy with her life as it is.

Now, Beloved, Her boyfriend refuses to come around here because of shame? embarrassment?, fear? I am not sure. So Beloved takes him to her biological mother's house to hang out all day there. He will go there into a house of "thieves" comfortable around those who rejoice in sin and lies and encourage others to join them.
V. 2 How long will my enemy triumph over me? v 4 my enemy will say, "I have overcome him and my foes will rejoice when I fall.
And "Falling" I am.

Offered Communion yesterday at church, My heart festering with bitterness and disappointment, hardening against my loving God, broken with my unworthiness. My tears soaking my shirt as I stared at the communion element in my hands.

"Take communion with Faith" my sister in Christ leaned over to whispered to me.
So simple,
It is not what I do or don't do, It is not who I am or how I feel at the moment.

It is what HE DID, WHO HE IS, HOW HE FEELS ABOUT ME. It is about the sacrifice He was willing to pay for ME. FAITH


V"6 I will sing to the Lord, for he has been good to me.